Sunday, April 02, 2006

Well then fine

Ok so like usual I give up. I give up on work, life, guys, so pretty much everything. I mean I don't feel like I am really doing anything that is going to get me ahead. I mean I work hard but so far all MTV has avaible for me is the possibility of doing freelance for an outside company, I mean its really frustrating. That is not really what I had in mind when we were looking to hopefully place me somewhere. I mean there is a slight possibility that I can actually do the job, but I'm not sure I have what it takes to be a carp. I mean its not something that I've worked on.

Also my parents are driving me freaking crazy. They don't quite understand what an internship is. They think that if they like you they keep you on, that is not how it works. I mean if they like me they can try and place me, but when you take an internship there is not a job at the end, no matter how talented you are. I can't take this I mean everytime I talk to my dad its so hows the job search coming. It drives me crazy. I can't take it anymore. I mean my family likes to harp on shit, If it gives them something to talk about great we are going to talk someone to death until they kill someone.

Then, if my life can't get any better, Jen invited me up to her house for a girls weekend. Yeah it sounded all well and dandy on the phone, but not quite how it worked out. She didn't mention that her sister was also coming up, not that I don't love her sister, she is great and if she wasn't here I would be alone at 8 pm. But its different, now I'm the fun third wheel. Also I wish she would of been like you know with chris gone away I could really use some help with Jack since now that I'm pregnant I can't reallly do much, unless its something I want to do, then I will have infinate energy. I just like people to tell me these things. I wouldnt have minded as much if she would have outright said that, like when I come up next weekend I already know Chris is essentially useless so I am here to take care of Jack, but it hurts me more when I think they want to spend time with me, when they really want me to take care of Jack.

Well I have seemed to vent enough, I have to dry my hair and see what we are doing for the day, More shopping and then I will probably grab an early train. I want to catch Greys Anatomy, and if I am going to watch it alone I might as well go home and not have to wake up at 6am to catch a train home. Whatever I'm just venting. I'll be ok eventually.